Crazy Cycle CD (10 Pack)

Your husband knows you value his friendship when you tell him you like him and you show it (he knows you love him, but he often wonders if you really like him).

God is not pink. God is not blue. God is purple. When two become one, they have the potential of displaying God’s attributes and character.

You may believe that the careless, unloving or disrespectful words you speak are because your spouse is causing you to speak this way, but Jesus says that it is coming out of your heart.

His love motivates her respect. Her respect motivates his love.

[Women], your self-love cannot be derived from your husband’s love. It can affect it, but it does not determine it.

We can all have moments of anger, but this does not mean we have to lose control and sin.

Love and Respect is a faith venture, not a formula.

We blame people for the bad things we do, but take credit for the good things we do.

When a husband feels disrespected, he has a natural tendency to react in ways that feel unloving to his wife. (Perhaps the command to love was given to him precisely for this reason!) When a wife feels unloved, she has a natural tendency to react in ways that feel disrespectful to her husband. (Perhaps the command to respect was given to her precisely for this reason!)

Respect for the husband is just as important as love for the wife.

The key to motivating another person is meeting their deepest need, especially during conflict.

In the ultimate sense, your marriage has nothing to do with your spouse. It has everything to do with your relationship to Jesus Christ.

When you come home after you have been apart, the first few moments of reconnecting will set the tone for the rest of the evening.

We are either going to give in the darkness or we are going to give into the darkness.

The Crazy Cycle is, indeed, “the evil of folly and the foolishness of madness” (Ecclesiastes 7:25).

You must “ask God from the wealth of his glory to give you power through his Spirit to be strong in your inner selves.”

Thank God for joining you together and for allowing you to trust Him to help you, whatever the issue. God is there for you and expects you to look to Him to keep you together as a team, so ask Him for His help in the smallest of concerns. “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” (Matthew 19:6)

God is good and wants what is best for us.

Thank God for His forgiveness of your mistakes. In trying to be a loving man or a respectful woman, we blow it. Owning up to mistakes is never easy, but it is always the way to move forward. Take good care not to accuse your spouse of mistakes as you pray. Also, pray about any forgiving to be done in the family, any forgiveness that needs to be asked. Children may need forgiveness (and what about Mom and Dad?). “There is no one on earth who does what is right all the time and never makes a mistake.” (Ecclesiastes 7:20)

Recognize your different gifts--how each of you (Pink and Blue) functions according to God’s perfect design.

In your marriage be the first to “seek peace and pursue it” (1 Peter 3:11)

How we react to a situation reveals more about us than about the other person.

Avoid like the plague trying to punish each other as a means of “motivation.” Christ-followers instinctively know that this destroys any opportunity to act out of reverence for Christ. In all marital issues, love and reverence for Christ must be our primary motivation.

God rewards your obedience to love and respect, even if your spouse does not respond!

It is so easy to draw wrong conclusions about a spouse’s character and motives due to an occasional flare-up or silly comment.

Thank the Lord that in the very beginning He created them male and female – Blue and Pink. Ask Him for patience and ever-growing understanding of how men and women see and hear differently. “He created them male and female, and He blessed them.” (Genesis 5:2)

We are worth Jesus to the Father.

Don’t conclude that your spouse is wrong when he/she is seeking to do the right and righteous thing.

[Husbands] do you realize the power of just holding your wife’s hand?

Life is too short to fuss and fret over trivial irritations.

A man has a natural, inborn desire to go out and “conquer” the challenges of his world – to work and achieve.

Being friendly to her man is one of the most effective things a woman can do to strengthen her marriage.

Be friendly. Be friendly. Be friendly. Watch what happens.

I had often asked God to compensate for my mistakes, but in return had I thought He would give me perfect children?

We have to step back as Christ followers and ask, “Do I have false expectations that my relationship should be romantic 99% of the time?”

As you pray together, you will truly learn to love and respect together.

Just because you’re offended doesn’t mean the other person is offensive.

Your spouse can have a need that you don’t have and that’s okay.

To build a lasting legacy, use proven wisdom that you glean from the Lord.

You both forgive for one simple but profound reason: because you know Christ has forgiven you!

Be a part of the solution, not part of the problem.

God’s commands are there to help us, not to hinder us or hold us back as male and female.

No matter what your struggle- criticism, constant conflict, sex, money, parenting, harsh words- learning to communicate the Love and Respect way can help you make crucial changes and build the kind of relationship that God blesses.

When a wife asks, “Do you love me?” She is not trying to put her husband on the spot. She is simply looking for reassurance.

Your wife feels you are open with her when you discuss financial concerns, possible job changes or ideas for your future.

Your spouse has a need only you can fill.

When a husband feels disrespected, it is especially hard to love his wife. When a wife feels unloved, it is especially hard to respect her husband.

Mutual understanding, not communication, is the key to a healthy marriage relationship.

The heart of my communication means the other person cannot get my heart to be unkind, unloving, or disrespectful. Instead, I have made a decision about who I will be independent of the other person. I won’t blame my unkindness on someone else.

Whose voice are you listening to: Hollywood or God’s Holy Word?

Your marriage is a test of your devotion to Christ.

Negative actions rarely produce positive results.

You must distinguish between “I can’t” and “I won’t.”

Marriage is a tool and a test to deepen and demonstrate your love and your reverence for Jesus Christ.

We might say that every negative action in the family has an equal and opposite negative reaction.

“You can be right, but wrong at the top of your voice.”

When your wife comes to talk to you, listen to her. Realize she is coming to you because you matter more to her than anyone else. She has certain emotional needs and only you can meet them. Sometimes she may say things that don’t make sense to you and she is apt to misspeak and exaggerate when she is upset, but don’t put her down. Instead, listen to her heart. Give her a chance to express her concerns and, as she does so, don’t try to fix her. Don’t give her your solutions unless she asks for them.

When there is confusion, I try to refrain from attacking another for not listening carefully (which may not be the case). Instead, I take a run at communicating again, but more clearly.

“Respect is a man’s deepest value. I have had numerous men tell me, ‘I would rather live with a wife who respected me but did not love me than live with a wife who loved me but did not respect me.’ These men are not saying that they are indifferent to love. They know they need love, but they need to feel respected even more than they need to feel loved.“

When we speak before we think, we widen the chances the other person(s) will be notably hurt, frustrated, confused, angry, fearful, or offended by something we’ve communicated.

You cannot use unholy means to achieve a worthy end.

Always see your mate as an ally. Feedback is of little use if you see your spouse as an enemy. Giving and receiving constructive feedback is based on feelings of goodwill in both partners. Both of you need to remember that, even if you don’t always agree and even if you become irritated or angry, you are friends, and neither of you means to hurt the other.

A most significant point of this book is this: If what we think is true, kind, necessary, and clear, we need to have the courage to hit send. This isn’t about refraining from speaking; this is about speaking.

You can be right but wrong at the top of your voice.

When you love or respect unconditionally regardless of the outcome, you are following God and His will for you.

To not forgive is to shoot yourself in the foot and put extra gas in the Crazy Cycle.

There is power and freedom that comes in understanding that no one can cause you to react in a certain way. It is your choice.

Could you be facing a crisis in faith more than a crisis in your marriage?

Responding to offensive words or actions with your own offensive words and actions is damaging and unproductive.

When others do not respond to our communication, we need to look first at our communication style. Is the other person incapable of hearing what we have to say? Or are we abrupt, brusque, and curt?

It’s hard to realize that we would never act around our business associates the way we act around our spouse.

Thank the Lord for all the trouble-free moments in which you and your spouse enjoy Him, each other, your family, your ministry and life as a whole. Ask Him for the strength to accept your measure of trouble, and the wisdom to deal with the annoyances and irritations by loving and respecting each other with new commitment. (You may also want to pray about troubles at work, at church, with the children…) “But those who marry will have trouble in this life” (1 Corinthians 7:28)

A strong woman of dignity puts on respect out of her love and reverence for Jesus Christ. She trusts that His word not only protects and empowers her, but also rewards her with incomprehensible eternal blessings.

When you’re truly Christ-centered, instead of child-centered, you will be a more effective parent in the long run.

Self-interest should never come ahead of your spouse’s interests.

Trust God when the “why’s” of life threaten to overwhelm you.

It’s true that women have intuition and that men should listen to them. It’s also true that women have blind spots and need the insight of their husbands.

Always remember that Pink and Blue have different wiring, different preferences. Assume your spouse has goodwill toward you, no matter what. Both of you can be right, while being different.

Just because you may feel unloved or disrespected does not mean your spouse is sending that message.

Every marriage includes trouble some of the time. Do not let the 20% leaven all the rest.

We can communicate the truth in the best of manners, but the person may be so insecure he or she can only react and attack like a wounded bear.

When parents genuinely trust and follow the Lord and His ways, their faith spills over onto the children.

Your words reveal your heart.

Most marriages will succeed when obeying the command to Love and Respect.

To get offended is easy, but to forgive is within your power as you walk in His steps.

If you are seeking positive change in your marriage, you will need to make a positive change in your attitude and actions.

Money squabbles don’t undermine love and respect; they simply reveal unloving and disrespectful attitudes, which are the real reason why a marriage can start to wobble on the Crazy Cycle.

When a husband chooses to do or say something loving, and that includes saying, ‘I’m sorry for coming across in an unloving way,’ he energizes his wife. When a wife decides to express herself respectfully, and that includes apologizing for her disrespectful attitude, she energizes her husband.

A marriage relationship will be energized when couples learn how to motivate each other God’s way.

Your spouse can affect you, but your spouse does not control you.

Suppressing negative feelings is not loving, respectful or very wise. Speak up tactfully.

Research and experience prove that men and women see and hear differently. Recognizing these differences and adjusting to them is absolutely necessary for reaching mutual understanding and better communication.

Do you believe that there is a God who really loves you and wants to help you?

It is crucial for a husband and wife to see that neither one is wrong, but both of them are very different--in body function, outlook and perspective.

Do you bow to the influence of Hollywood or God’s Holy Word?

As a wife, if you can start to understand how important your husband’s work is to him, you will take a giant step toward communicating respect and honor, two things that he values even more than your love.

The woman absolutely needs love, and the man absolutely needs respect. It’s as simple- and as difficult- as that.

Refuse to let evil turn you into a contemptuous and hateful person.

When confronting your spouse, attack the behavior, not the person.

Being a person who communicates what is true frequently demands tact, and at times it can feel like sidestepping land mines. It takes work to be both truthful and tactful.