Marriage

Keep Your Finger on the Pulse of Your Marriage

A Husband's Temptations Can Result in the Wife Feeling Like a Failure

A Husband's Temptations Can Result in the Wife Feeling Like a Failure

As one wife said, "Women don’t have a vulnerability when it comes to sexual matters like male nudity, but they do have a concern about the vulnerability that their husbands have in this area with regard to pornography or the sexually seductive female.

Who We Are To God And Who God Is To Us In Marriage?

Who We Are To God And Who God Is To Us In Marriage?

Realizing we are "saints" in God's view regardless of our failures in marriage (Ephesians 1:1-14). As believers, we must understand that in God’s eyes, we are saints, holy and blameless, regardless of any marital struggles we may face.

Keep Your Finger on the Pulse of Your Marriage

Keep Your Finger on the Pulse of Your Marriage

Marriage is a journey filled with highs and lows, moments of joy, and periods of conflict. It's essential to keep your finger on the pulse of your marriage, being aware of your own emotions and those of your spouse. This awareness can help you navigate through challenging times with grace and understanding.

The Vince Lombardi Approach to Marriage: Mastering the Fundamentals

The Vince Lombardi Approach to Marriage: Mastering the Fundamentals

At the beginning of every new football season, Vince Lombardi would lift up the focal object of their game and exclaim, “Gentlemen, this is a football.” The point he was making to his team was simple: start with the basics. If they are to find success on the field, then the fundamentals of their game must be mastered and maintained.

When the Energizing Cycle Doesn’t Work

When the Energizing Cycle Doesn’t Work

When it comes to faithfully and unconditionally applying love and respect in your marriage, what do most people say their worst fear is? For a husband, it’s that he learns to show love in the way that should touch his wife at her core but then she still shows him contempt. In response to his goodwilled attempts to be close, open, understanding, peacemaking, loyal, and esteeming (see C.O.U.P.L.E. from my book Love & Respect), she remains disrespectful.

The Vince Lombardi Approach to Marriage: Mastering the Fundamentals

When the Energizing Cycle Doesn’t Work

Key Truths about a Husband and Wife Needing and Desiring Sex - Part 1 - Even Hollywood Gets It About Women

Key Truths about a Husband and Wife Needing and Desiring Sex - Part 1 - Even Hollywood Gets It About Women

In my opinion, anyone who watches movies gets the message that men and women have sexual needs and desires but that they are not the same. In the movie For the Love of the Game, Billy Chapel (played by Kevin Costner) and Jane Aubrey (Kelly Preston) meet and hook up sexually. Because Billy travels as a professional baseball pitcher with the Detroit Tigers, they make a deal. Jane says, "So, when you're away, I'll live my life and you'll live yours. And none of this 'why didn't you call me?' crap. And what you do when you're not with me has nothing to do with me, and vice versa. No questions asked, no worrying, no obsessing."

She Wants Him to Lead, So Why Doesn’t He?

She Wants Him to Lead, So Why Doesn’t He?

Even though men and women are equal in the eyes of God, Scripture is clear that God has charged men with being the family’s spiritual leader (1 Corinthians 11:3; 1 Peter 3:1; Ephesians 5:22). I have found among most wives who follow Christ that not only do they not resist this biblical mandate but they actually hold a deep desire for their husbands to be the spiritual leader.

It’s All About Jesus

If you have attended or heard a Love and Respect Marriage Conference or read any of the books, more than likely you will recall some of my favorite terms, analogies, and acronyms, such as: Pink and Blue, C.O.U.P.L.E., C.H.A.I.R.S., the Crazy Cycle, the Energizing Cycle, and the Rewarded Cycle. While it certainly always brings a smile to my face to hear from readers and others that they, even many years later, still talk about “needing to get off the Crazy Cycle” or “their pink hearing aids didn’t hear what their blue husband was really saying,” what I most hope that people will remember is how all of this should be used to point them to Jesus. Let me explain.

It’s All About Jesus

You Want Your Husband to Hear Your Heart—The Answer May Be to First H.E.A.R. Him

You Want Your Husband to Hear Your Heart—The Answer May Be to First H.E.A.R. Him

A wife longs for her husband to hear her heart. She becomes insecure when he does not. What can she do? Given your husband has goodwill and wants to do God's will, I suggest looking in four areas and trying to “H.E.A.R.” your husband. H:Honor his desire to honor God. If there is any positive thing you see in his walk with God, say, "I want to honor your desire to honor God. I have noticed how you _____." Fill in the blank. While most likely there are things you wish he did in his walk with God that he isn't currently doing, don't go there. This exercise is about addressing the positive—how you see your husband honoring God—because it is true, honorable, and right.