Testimonials

I am newly married and this is what I needed to hear to help my groom and me make some early course corrections (especially me!). I had heard about the Love & Respect book but never really understood the heart of the author. Now I want to learn more because this is God’s precious truth to us.

I would like to take a moment and thank you for your wonderful book – Love and Respect. I don’t even remember how I came across it – but it is so refreshing to read the truth regarding the intricacies of the relationship between husband and wife, as God designed them to be. I just turned 69 years old – and am very happily married to my husband (of nearly 49 years – we were married in 1972). We have 6 children and 24 grandchildren. I have always had an interest in knowing how to create an atmosphere where love and tenderness not only exist, but continue to grow as time goes on. I have read many books over the years (made plenty of mistakes) – but that was always the goal. It is appalling to me to watch what the women’s movement has done to marriages and families. The lack of respect for men shocks me. I will never forget the day I went into a CVS store for a Father’s Day card. I opened a card that read: “This card is anatomically correct – we didn’t give him any brains.”So I appreciate your fearlessness in teaching the truth. I learned things in your book that no one else (in books I had read) had ever explained. For instance – the shoulder to shoulder concept – about how men don’t really need to have a lot of conversation to enjoy time with their wives. How nice to know that. I have decided that I am going to give your book for wedding gifts. It will cut the learning curve down considerably for those that are just beginning their lives together – and hopefully save them some mistakes along the way. May God Bless you for all you do.

I’ve seen the Crazy Cycle in my past, I’ve seen it in my own relationships, and I saw it in my parents’ relationship. I could never put my finger on it, though, and it scared me…Learning about this makes me so hopeful—hopeful that perhaps I won’t find myself in a relationship that ends up drifting away.

My wife and I thoroughly enjoyed the conference at Calvary in Charlotte. We went more than a year ago in Winston Salem when I had just moved back into the house after a 6-month separation. Neither my wife nor I cheated on each other. However, we got caught on the Crazy Cycle for 13 years, could not identify it, and thus, could not get off of it. We were in DEEP! At the conference two weeks ago, I rated our marriage at a '5' of '7'. That is pretty good considering we were at a '0' in Winston. In Winston Salem, I must say that I really did not hear anything of Saturday's teaching on the Energizing Cycle because all I could do was replay in my mind the Crazy Cycle material from the night before. We were so undone that the Energizing Cycle was not even applicable. We had not been physically intimate for almost two years. The biggest step for us was to start seeing each other as 'good-willed' people again. This time it was different.Because God has so moved in our marriage and our intimacy is back, the Energizing Cycle was very applicable, and I listened to Saturday's material very intently.I would suggest multiple conferences for everyone, but especially for couples who go to the first one in real crisis. Applying the Crazy Cycle insights got us from a '0' to a '5'. Now our prayers are that we will be a '7' very soon.

I have read Love and Respect years ago so I was familiar with the Respect message. However, I had not realized how much I didn’t know… What I didn’t know was my son, now adult, was starving for my respect as much as my husband did in the past. I always expected my son to show respect to me while thinking love was all he needed from me. Now, Emerson has opened my eyes again to the reality. I am getting ready to construct a letter to my adult son telling him how much I Respect him. I love the fact that there are practical words and phrases to use with my son that I would have never thought to say., Words that he longs to hear from me. Mother and Son is worth your read. Emerson will help you understand your son better.

I just appreciate so much Joy’s heart and her father’s heart and their ability to communicate generationally—even cover that generational gap—and draw together themes that are timeless but need to be communicated in a way that is going to speak to an audience that is already cynical, already skeptical.

"The challenge that was given in each email was very helpful. My wife and I have been married over 20 years and we had something come in between us. This sent our marriage into the crazy cycle. It just uncovered hurts and past events that were already there. Over the time and reading and praying, God revealed I have many past hurts from my upbringing I never dealt with, which are reflected in outbursts when tension arises. ...working through the 15 day challenge, I am learning to LOVE my wife in a deeper way to see her heart not her attacks. I have never needed this 15 day challenge more than I did over the last few months."

"Hello! thank you so much for the love and respect academy two week plan. To say it has been game changing is an understatement.

Just one error I found with the 60 sec test. It didn’t take 60 sec.... I didn’t even have time to count before my husband said “really? What are they?” Not only that, the tone and demeanor changed and softened in a split second. I had to stop myself from laughing out loud and dropping my jaw on how accurate and simple it was to connect with and create an honoring moment for my husband. I have since turned it into a weekly occurrence when we meet to plan our week. And I can tell that he is (not so patiently) waiting for this moment during our time together.

Thank you for all you continue to do. I am also reading Love & Respect In The Family right now and it is both convicting and encouraging at the exact same time. Thank you for the truth you share. It makes all the difference for this family."

Love and Respect has an amazing strategy that we noticed immediately. It has a biblical foundation, keeping Christ in the center of our daily lives, and the amazing message of the gospel and how to receive salvation. It is realistic and demonstrates scenarios based on daily life. Love and Respect has helped us to better understand each other and how to think about our actions before you commit them. The course is so powerful spiritually that it has ignited both of us not only to improve but also to start getting engaged in the field of marriage and the gospel. Love and Respect is truly a blessing.

"I have been implementing each day’s challenge and have been truly blessed. I’ve really become aware of how quickly our tone is sour when we are tired or frustrated and I’ve really been able to catch myself before responding disrespectfully. My husband is more outwardly verbal and irritable but I had no idea how much I show contempt or feel it in reacting to him. I feel so great practicing responding with kindness in areas I used to find myself huffing even on the inside. It’s very freeing to not be caught in that cycle. I’ve also been practicing being cheerful after coming home from work. We honestly have no clue how negative we are in a day until we start to study our own actions. Thank you so much. I definitely needed this refresher course in the Love and Respect. I had passed my book on to another couple years ago. I miss having my own copy. I’m so glad you made this available."

My wife and I attended a Conference Live In-Person a few years back and it changed our marriage. We were frustrated, as this is our second marriage each,… we so much wanted to glorify God but we seemed to be doing so much wrong. We walked out during a break, looked up at the sky and simultaneously, shouted "I get it!".  Our marriage has been tremendous ever since (sure we have crazy cycles, but they are so rare & short lived nowadays and truly lead to resolve). In fact, the Holy Sprit moved upon my wife one Sunday morning and after following the right steps we became Pre-marriage Mentors at our church for the past 3 years now - we LOVE it. We are looking forward to going through the Conference again and having this material at our fingertips for reference. "My Response is my Responsibility" has been tremendously helpful not only for our marriage but in so many other areas of our life.

Please let me say that I have enjoyed your material for quite a while. Several years ago I purchased a DVD set of an earlier seminar that I and my wife have watched several times together. I still like to sit down with the DVD's and freshen up my understanding of the marriage relationship.