Testimonials

In talking to my sons on the phone, I thought I would try out the respect thing. Instead of always ending our conversation with I love you, I said, “I respect (I made it personal to their situations).” One son got quiet and then said, “Thank you, mom,” which really touched my heart. Another son who is more distant from us emotionally and spiritually also got quiet and then said, “I love you,” which he seldom says first or responds to when I say it. To me that was awesome. I expect new fruit in many areas and look forward to using these tools to bring healing to first myself and then others. God bless your ministry.

I wish I would have learned about win-win before we got married. I would have been able to practice these principles while we were courting. I knew there would be challenges but because of each of our personalities they took a long, long, time to really show up. We suppressed a lot of things not wanting to upset the other or bring up something frustrating. If we would have realized that we could have a win-win scenario and communicated about things right away, it wouldn't have taken a decade for major challenges to surface. The Marine Corps is all about preparing for friction and challenges so that concept is easy for me to grasp, the Bible gives us all the tools, but I had never considered solutions in marriage being a win-win situation. I had always heard the emphasis on sacrificing for the other person which I figured could go either way, but the win-win concept I have never considered or heard advocated...despite the fact that it's right there, in the Bible.

"My own experiences along with your advice have resulted in a miracle in my life. I enjoy my husband as I did when we were courting (more, even). Our sex life has improved 100% as I find respecting my husband a turn-on (believe it or not). Today, he gets more than enough respect (and sex) and I get all the love and protection that I could ever want. There is now great joy in my marriage thanks to your help."

"The challenge that was given in each email was very helpful. My wife and I … had a troubled teenager come in between us. This sent our marriage into the crazy cycle. It just uncovered hurts and past events that were already there…Now going through the study deeper and working through the 15 Day Plan, I am learning to LOVE my wife in a deeper way to see her heart, not her attacks."

"We attended the conference and want to let you know how blessed we were by the truth you spoke. God has used your message to transform us and our marriage. We are amazed at the miracle and work He is doing in us individually and in our marriage. Your message of love & respect gave us a great start, and God has been gracious to help us along in the journey."

"A wonderful change in our relationship began and we both tried to be understanding of each other. Your course just fit in perfectly and filled in the missing pieces…We are to respect our differences. Laughter and peace has come into our home again. Thank you! (My husband) and I had several opportunities to share the principles of Love and Respect with several other Christian couples and of how God was working in our lives and marriage…Already we have had some couples into our home and shared our experience and then we sit and play your CD and end it by praying a prayer of forgiveness and healing for our relationships."

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My small group of twenty something women just finished week three of TIP last night, and I am LOVING it! The content is obviously great (way to relate to and entertain a group of easily jaded/skeptical/seen-it-all/overwhelmed twentysomethings!), the concepts are something we’re all wrestling through together, but the very best part is Joy’s encouragement to be multigenerational. We have about six older women who’ve rotated through our weekly gatherings, and that element is making this one of the BEST things I’ve ever been a part of! It’s really amazing. Having these women—from a woman who’s been married more than 50 years to a fiftysomething never-been-married woman to thirty- and fortysomething women with kids—listen, share their hearts and experiences, share their own illuminations and wrestle with the concepts and God’s truth alongside my girls is SO DARN AMAZING. For one, it takes pressure off me as the leader to ‘have all the answers’ (I’m 29 and have been married for six years... I barely know what I’m doing myself!). And the fact that these women from different places in life are getting to know one other, open up to each other, ugh.... there. just. aren’t. words.

"Just wanted to say that this ministry is really blessing my life. I have been able to share it with other people and it already blessed them as well! Please don't EVER GIVE UP! I am sure sometimes, it must be very difficult. But it is so worthy to spread this message. So many marriages being attacked and in need of information like this."

Already having authored the best relationship material available, Emerson and Joy are shedding new light and deeper understanding about the Love and Respect thought process that will change your life.  Under the banner of The Illumination Project, this father/daughter team are now combining their brilliant observations with a unique style of ‘wisdom meets passion’ to bring our society some of the answers for which many of us have waited our whole lives.

Thank you for teaching me about respect and what it truly means in my life. You’ve given me the courage to be respectful to those around me, even when they get on my nerves. You’ve given me the tools to have confidence and through Christ all things are possible. I can take that home and be respectful toward my mother and to lay the foundation so that someday my mom will also know Christ. I opened myself up in ways that have been laid on my heart for some time. I can begin again.

…I have been thinking about doing something for our marriage for some time, but my husband was not in favor. He was always bothered by the method—one on one, and of course, the financial aspect. He decided to try Building Blocks primarily because the course was practically free. After five years this was our first planned and regular time away doing something for the two of us.  At first, I was a bit skeptical about the religious aspect, since my husband has practically no experience or a negative attitude towards religion. But it turned out to be completely acceptable, probably because you do not reinforce it…My husband rarely wanted to think about these things—he thought it was meaningless. He heard things for the first time in Building Blocks and discovered things he never talked about before. Certain truths really inspired him and consequently, me too. We both remember lesson five: My Response is My Responsibility. It made the greatest impression on us. In fact, I think I will write this on the wall in the bedroom! Perhaps the most valuable insight for both is the fact that we are not alone in our troubles and that others have very similar challenges…

I learned that this teaching didn’t feed his ego, but actually humbled him and caused him to want to connect and talk.