Testimonials

"Thank you! I began the 15 day plan and then my husband several days later. I had shared a few and that inspired him. It spoke to both of us. We had read your book " Love & Respect" some years ago and we could relate but whether timing or format it really made an impact this time. I see an improvement in my husband and now when we head in the direction of the crazy cycle we recognize it & can laugh instead of argue!...Needless to say we both said we wanted to order the next plan and he has intended to. In fact we hope in the future to use your material to mentor other couples."

I’ve seen the Crazy Cycle in my past, I’ve seen it in my own relationships, and I saw it in my parents’ relationship. I could never put my finger on it, though, and it scared me…Learning about this makes me so hopeful—hopeful that perhaps I won’t find myself in a relationship that ends up drifting away.

Respectfully Yours was exceedingly helpful for me in my marriage! Understanding ‘the crazy cycle’ has made a huge difference for both me and my husband. I highly recommend the study for its practical use and application.

I am currently using this ... for my personal use. I am applying respect into my marriage and this kit has really helped me through the tough, lonely and hurtful parts in still staying the course... This Respectfully Yours Kit has helped fine tune more of what women need to know when it comes to staying the course with a disobedient husband...I am forever changed and am praising God for this change. I know I don’t understand it all or how but I DO believe in GOD and HE will help me finish this on the other side with more than I could ever think or imagine. (I am praising HIS name in this and letting anyone I know about Dr. Emerson’s work he has done for me.) I trust God and will focus on him and not my problems. I do respect my husband and I love him dearly. And with time hopefully soon he will open his heart back to me...

We have seven participants aged 23 to 29. I would characterize the group as each a believer, but their levels of spiritual maturity and personal relationship with Jesus vary considerably. It was clear that our test group was ‘willing’ but more than a little bit apprehensive. This was new territory for them. We wondered if we’d be able to stimulate discussion afterward. Ha! The group couldn’t wait to comment! We’ll have more to share as the weeks move on, but, suffice it to say, we might be ‘on to something’ here.

"My own experiences along with your advice have resulted in a miracle in my life. I enjoy my husband as I did when we were courting (more, even). Our sex life has improved 100% as I find respecting my husband a turn-on (believe it or not). Today, he gets more than enough respect (and sex) and I get all the love and protection that I could ever want. There is now great joy in my marriage thanks to your help."

One thing that I just love about The Illumination Project, what makes it unique, is that you have these two different generations being represented in Emerson and Joy. With Emerson, you have his wisdom and years of writing on this stuff and traveling and counseling couples through marriage, and so you have his passion and his truth. But on the other hand, you have Joy representing the younger crowd, and she makes it relevant and brings her passion and charisma, and the real-life context that we young people are up against. And that synergetic relationship working together is really a phenomenal dynamic to watch. Not to mention: People want to talk about this. They want to talk about love and romance and dating and marriage.

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I have two boys...  I have recently read and listened to this book. I feel like this book has opened my eyes to how much I fail in my conversations with them... The conversations in your book are so foreign to me with my boys. I am at the point now where I can see where I did not respond with respect, now I need to get the vocabulary burned into my brain! It is going to be a process of changing my vocabulary, but I am committed to the long haul! I know it is what my young men need… The biggest mindset change has been with me focusing on spending shoulder to shoulder time with them and watching them doing things...  I now have the freedom to just do stuff with them and not have to talk. This last weekend I was home alone with my [son]. We spent a lot of time talking about whatever was on his mind (he loves to talk), going for walks, playing things he enjoys, and working outside. It was a lot of shoulder to shoulder time. I cannot tell you how many times he said that he just loves spending time with me. This is the same kid that a week ago said that I don't act like I like him. On one walk he said that he was going to stay with me so he could protect me. Later in the weekend I said that I was glad he was with me and that I wasn't alone because I felt safer having him there. He was so energized by that.

"My husband and I attended the Love and Respect Conference. We have been married for 31 years; committed, but not always happy. As we chaotically plunged through our 40's, we created a lot of devastation in our relationship. For some years, my husband did not say "I love you."... He refused to talk about anything of significance. Emotionally, he had shut down and consequently, did not try to connect with me in any way. For a long time, I chafed under this treatment…This is how we were when we came to the conference. I was actually afraid that he would be more annoyed than anything else. BUT...As a wonderful, undeserved gift from the Father who so incredibly bestows good things on his children, God opened my husband's heart… he became a changed man. A man who loves me, adores me, apologizes to me quickly…and talks to me all the time. Praise God from whom all blessings flow. Thank you for being willing to share the message of love and respect across our nation. I am forever grateful."

Your book was a powerful eye opener for me. Incredibly insightful. Practically helpful ...thank you for it. And I'm grateful to God - through Christ - for the way in which He's been using it in our lives. Truly.

"Thank you so much for the 15-day plan...I really was happy to have a review of the material and the ability to print it out and apply it over and over! I intend to keep reading it from time to time and I am sure the application will be ongoing in my marriage. What stood out to me in the 15-day plan:  awareness of the differences in our felt needs, the importance of the tone used in conversation, avoiding contempt, expressing positive regard for the person, and the significance of giving your spouse what they need but do not deserve."

"The changes in my marriage are so drastic that it can only be attributed to a miracle…my life will NEVER be the same. I will, with God's help, ALWAYS seek God and His ways. My marriage has changed and my children will be blessed because of it. This truly does make a difference for generations to come."