I would like to thank you for pointing out God's word to us. It has saved our marriage!  Four years ago my husband left because he felt no respect after 9 years of marriage.  He did not know this is what he lacked but through your teachings he learned that God created him to desire respect and God is still teaching me daily to show respect.  In turn my husband showed more love towards me, go figure.  My husband did come back after a month and now we're about to celebrate our 13th anniversary.  Your teaching on the crazy cycle helps us daily to identify why we're doing what we are doing and stop.  I know that God used you to show us HIS way to build a marriage on God's rock foundation and not one on sand, of our own making.

Thanks a million.  You saved 2 little boys from losing their dad and they are now seeing what a marriage in God should look like.  We love you and thank God for you!

I heard a short interview with you on a local Christian radio station the morning after my wife and I had THE fight. The one where we questioned if we would stay together. We are Christians so divorce was not an option, but separation looked better and better each day. I bought your book soon after and the changes in my behavior and my wife`s reaction to those changes were immediate and profound. Now I see my wife like I saw her on our wedding day, and she wants to come home after work!  We are closer than we were our first year of marriage, and our 17 yr. old daughter is noticeably happier. THANK YOU!

In Fall of 2008 my wife and I were in a very bad place in our marriage. I had fought a secret battle in my mind for years that had finally found roots in infidelity on my part, which spanned several people over several months.  My wife of 27 years found out through looking at my laptop, and needless to say she was devastated.  I came home from work immediately and met her, and God did a miracle in my life by freeing me from that bondage (this is the short version...!)... We decided that we would stay together and try to heal our marriage, and a couple from our church walked with us weekly for a year.  Your book was an incredible eye-opener for us: we discovered that we had been living our entire marriage completely backwards, which really set us up for failure in many ways.  With the help of your book and our counselors, in December 2009 we recommitted our vows to each other at our church and shared my testimony.  We still have rocky times, and there is much healing yet to go, but I can't thank you enough for the message you have written about, and for being willing to be His messenger to a broken and hurting world.

My fiance and I are currently reading "Love and Respect." Just a few chapters in and we have already been changed for the better. As devout Christians and being madly in love, we still knew something was missing. This book has some, if not all, of the answers. I know I will be a better man, a better Christian, and a better husband when that day comes. Thank you so much for writing this book and sharing this with everyone.

I joined a "Motivating your Man God's Way" study (by Dr. Emerson and Sarah Eggerichs) at church because a friend of mine had done it and said it changed her marriage.  I thought it was probably a worthwhile pursuit but "life changing"?  I had my doubts.  After the first chapter I was shocked by what I learned.  I did the "respect test" on my husband, who is usually very quiet about his feelings.  When I told him I respected him his response was "I don't think so".  I felt like I had been slapped.  I had no idea he felt that way.  He said he also felt that I was teaching our daughter to be disrespectful.  I sincerely apologized to him and made a vow to myself that things would change.

And they did!  I have tried to use the respect word honestly and frequently.  I wrote a letter telling him all the things I respected about him, apologized again for my lack of respect and promised to do better.  I left the letter on our bed.  When he came out of the bedroom after changing from work he held the letter up to me and said a soft and heartfelt "thank you".  It wasn't so much his words though, but the love on his face that touched me...I have told every woman I could about this "life changing" (yes, it is) event.  

We have a ways to go but our marriage is so much better.  There is a lot less arguing (I have learned how to jump off the Crazy Cycle) and a lot more loving.  Even my daughter is learning to show more respect to her father.  And I am hoping by sharing this with her now, when the time comes she will have a head start on becoming the wife God calls all women to be.  I cannot thank you enough for the Love and Respect ministries and how it is changing lives and marriages.  God bless you.

First of all, thank you so much for sharing your wisdom regarding "Love and Respect."  My husband and I attended your seminar and it opened my eyes in so many ways.  I realized what was missing in the way I respond to him and how I've been disrespectful towards him causing him to respond in unloving ways.  All this time I'm blaming him and asking and praying for God to change him.  Well, the conference was a big eye opener for me.  Thank You so much!!!

Last weekend was our 17th anniversary.  He's such a golf fanatic that I told him my gift for him would be for him to play golf at a golf course of his choice and money is no object.  To top it off, I told him that I'd caddie for him - drive the golf cart for him and whatever else a caddie does. He was excited the morning of our anniversary while getting ready for golf - he couldn't believe it.  Once we arrived at the golf course, he was telling everyone how that day was my anniversary gift for him and that l would even caddie for him.  I could tell he was so proud.  It was a VIP golf course and we were treated as such the whole time and he couldn't believe it.  All of the guys were saying they wish their wives would do same for them and one actually shook my hand and thanked me for what I did for my husband and said that men need more wives like me.  You can say that my husband had a smile the whole time and he said he actually shot his best score ever.  

I've always (thought) our anniversary is all about me and that he better have a nice gift for me.  You have changed that for me and I never would have thought of thinking about what would make him happy.....Thank you so much!!!!

Marine says, "We're still married because of Love and Respect"  

My wife and I have been married now for going on 10 years because of Love and Respect.  We got married at 20 and 21 years old. To add to it I am a United States Marine. Being with the first Americans into Iraq I established a bitter attitude and harshness towards my wife. Two years on recruiting duty led us to a separation. Understanding that this is not what God had in mind for us we went to church one Sunday and they were starting small groups. We were literally arguing over what small group we needed to be in and our pastor told us we needed Love and Respect. I am now the Men's Ministry Director and we are facilitating Love and Respect small groups for the third time and reaching this out to as many people as we can get it to.  Thank You for presenting this information and helping us understand each other. Not wrong just different... Blessings.

Love and Respect was recommended to me by my therapist.   I am in a blended family of 5 adult children and 10 grandchildren.  As I read the first chapter, "I got it."  I have told everyone that will listen about the book.  I loaned my copy to my daughter, (who) is recovering from a bad marriage.  She has in turn told all her friends.

I do have one regret.  I am 67 years old, and this is the most positive tool that I have ever been given about marriage. I intend to recommend it to other younger women that need to build a strong marriage.

I have just read your book and it has revolutionized my thinking in our marriage.  We have a fabulous marriage already but the respect/love points and the fact that most spouses are "good-willed" has helped me to bring our arguments to a place where we can be more objective.  This has lessened the attack on the person and put the focus on the issue at hand.  In so many instances in our 17 yrs. together I have not been able to define what has been our individual issues in our arguments, but now, I can even define for myself when my husband feels he is not being respected - he does not need to tell me - and I can change my actions accordingly... I would love to attend one of your conferences, but for now, your book has been a life-changer - thank you and God bless you.

My husband and I were on the verge of divorce.  My church loaned us the Love and Respect Videos.  They opened our eyes so much.  Our marriage took a complete turnaround!  When we thought there was no hope in marriage, we found hope and strength!